MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,641 (330): i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,642 (310): So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,644 (507): there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
(507): there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,645 (617): Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
(617): Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,646 (814): Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,647 (203): he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible... (1-203): your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
(203): he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible... (1-203): your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,651 (314): I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,652 (917): Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,653 (732): mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,654 (707): i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,655 (916): He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
(916): He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,656 (845): Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
(845): Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,657 (720): The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
(720): The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,658 (727): I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
(727): I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,659 (908): how convenient is it that the kid i'm ****ing lives right next to planned parenthood?
MacGyver Charter Member Apr 24, 2010 #1,660 (704): Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
