Only in the Keys

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Underage scooter drivers land mom in hot water

KEY WEST — A 44-year-old female tourist who allowed two underage teenagers to drive scooters was cited after she told an officer that “this is why cops get shot,”

according to an incident report.

The Georgia mother was cited for not having her driver’s license and allowing underage children to drive.
 
Key West love story
KEY WEST — A woman became enraged and beat up her lover because he would not “play with her butt” on Thursday according to what one man told police.

There were no arrests as each declined to press charges.
Is this your way of explaining your black eye.:huh:
 
Drunken man riding manatees arrested
BY ADAM LINHARDT Citizen Staff
alinhardt@keysnews.com
State wildlife officers arrested a drunk homeless man Friday afternoon after he reportedly was seen riding an adult manatee as well as a manatee calf in Islamorada, according to the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission.

Officers were still trying to identify the man Friday afternoon as he was uncooperative and had no ID, said FWC spokesman Bobby Dube.
 
Screaming, drunken woman tries to hit pedestrians
KEY LARGO — A drunken woman accused of racing a car on a residential street while screaming racial slurs and trying to run over two people was arrested Thursday night, according to the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office.

Sonja Jones Lopez, 56, of Key Largo, was charged with felony aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, misdemeanor resisting arrest without violence
 
SPCA lets cat out of bag, arrests owner
A woman was jailed Wednesday after police say she punched an animal control officer in the face when he confronted her about carrying her cat in a duffle bag.

Holly Oswalt, 47, who gave police a Key Largo address, faces a misdemeanor charge of battery. She remained jailed Thursday on $2,500 bond.

View attachment 79829


She hates cats, known this tweaker when she used to hang here in Tempe AZ around the Noodles

She uses cats as alligator bait, evil woman

she's a xtc groupie, thinks she all hot and can dance, a wanna be deadhead who sells herself for zanex and booze

she's a widespread painc rail rider

Vern
 
Crime Report
Sunday, September 18
Drunken woman falls on face, runs into ER doors
SUMMERLAND KEY — A drunken woman fell on her face while running from deputies on the street, and then ran face-first into hospital emergency room doors after breaking free from deputies trying to hold her down Thursday afternoon, according to the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office.

Kristin Plante, 32, of Rockland Key, was charged with possession of cocaine

Mug45.jpg

Arrest Date: 09/15/2016 Time: 15:39 CAD #: MCSO16CAD128396 Offense #: MCSO16OFF006012
Name: PLANTE, KRISTIN MARIE DoB:01/09/1984 Age:32 Sex:F Race:W
Address: 7 CALLE UNO/9 MM GU, ROCKLAND KEY, FL 33040
Occupation: BOATER in ROCKLAND KEY
Arrest Location: 25163 OVERSEAS HWY, SUMMERLAND KEY
Arresting Officer/Agency: RODRIGUEZ, FREDDY - MCSO\DIST 1 ROAD PATROL Bond Amount: $0

Charges:
2 Misdemeanor Count(s) of 784.07.2a - SIMPLE ASSLT - ON OFFICER FIREFIGHTER EMT ETC
1 Misdemeanor Count(s) of 843.02 - RESIST OFFICER - OBSTRUCT WO VIOLENCE
1 Felony Count(s) of 893.13.6a - COCAINE-POSSESS - POSSESS COCAINE
1 Misdemeanor Count(s) of 893.13.6b - MARIJUANA-POSSESS - NOT MORE THAN 20 GRAMS
1 Unknown Count(s) of 903.0471 - CONDIT RELEASE VIOLATION -
 
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Face-plant followed by door face-smash the same day!!

I wonder if anybody got them on a cop-cam?
 
Looks like Your A-typical liberal greenie......nuts.

Friday, October 7, 2016Decrease text sizeIncrease text size
City board member faces felony charges
BY Scott Unger Key West Citizen
Key West Sustainability Advisory Board member Richard Lightner was charged with felony battery and felony resisting arrest following an incident at a New Town restaurant Tuesday afternoon.

Police were called to the Outback Steakhouse, but found Lightner, 71, nearby at Sweet Fire Chipotle, 3220 N. Roosevelt Blvd., at 4:38 p.m. as he was walking out of the restaurant’s front door, according to Key West Police.

They noticed an empty gun holster on his hip and found a filet knife on his person, as well as a multi-tool, reports state.

Lightner was reportedly asked to leave the steakhouse after calling a patron a terrorist and shoving the manager. Lightner appeared drunk and at first said he had diabetes and then denied it while telling police he would sue them, reports state.

Lightner kicked one officer and tried to trip him while he was being placed in custody, reports say.

Once in the police car, a Sweet Fire Chipotle employee informed officers that some of his property was still in the business. Police found a loaded .40-caliber Glock under a shirt, reports say.

Lightner, a former treasure salver, was appointed to the Sustainability Board on Nov. 5, 2015. He is also a Florida Green Building Coalition Certifying Agent. Lightner has also been a licensed real estate broker and certified builder since 1979, according to his resume.

Last year, Lightner filed a police report concerning a missing sign-in sheet at a meeting about cistern use.

He told police multiple speakers and citizens signed the sheet, but he added there were also “several activist groups opposed to the subjects being discussed,” reports say. Lightner told the officer the meeting was civil; however, he believed someone from one of the activist groups may have taken the sign-in sheet. No action was taken in the case.

Lightner was taken to Monroe County Detention Center on Stock Island and was released Wednesday after posting $5,000 bail.

sunger@keysnews.com

Email Story Link
 
Captain Bligh????


Mariner with gun arrested in 'mutiny'
MARATHON — A mariner claiming he was the victim of mutiny was arrested Thursday night after hitting a passenger with a gun and then firing the rifle during a sunset cruise, according to the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office.

Tobias Bybee, 38, of Marathon, was charged with four counts of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, one count of aggravated battery .


Mug14.jpg

Arrest Date: 10/06/2016 Time: 20:59 CAD #: MCSO16CAD137840 Offense #: MCSO16OFF006486
Name: BYBEE, TOBIAS LEE DoB:01/04/1978 Age:38 Sex:M Race:W
Address: STREETS OF MARATHON, MARATHON, FL 33050
Occupation:
Arrest Location: 1021 11 ST OCEAN, MARATHON
Arresting Officer/Agency: ALLEN, JOHN - MCSO\DIST 4 ROAD PATROL Bond Amount: $0

Charges:
4 Felony Count(s) of 784.021.1a - AGGRAV ASSLT - WEAPON - W DEADLY WEAPON WITHOUT INTENT TO KILL
1 Felony Count(s) of 784.045.1a2 - AGGRAV BATTERY - PERSON USES A DEADLY WEAPON
1 Felony Count(s) of 790.23.1a - POSSESSION OF WEAPON - OR AMMO BY CONVICTED FLA FELON
 
Woman charged for mailing drugs to jail
DUCK KEY — A 55-year-old woman accused of mailing drugs to her daughter in the Monroe County Detention Center on Stock Island last month was arrested Thursday, according to the Sheriff’s Office.

Nadine Carroll, of Duck Key, was charged with smuggling contraband into a detention facility.
 
Vandal hits Upper Keys campground
KEY LARGO — A penis-inspired vandal struck the Calusa Campground Resort and Marina Sunday night, according to the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office.

Eleven vehicles were vandalized at the campground, according to a press release.

There were no reported arrests and no suspects listed in the press release.
 
Drinking a lite though

It wasn't him. But a true beer drinker is a flex-fuel operation. For example, as we began to drink the Miami Boat Show out of beer, we had to adapt quickly to changing brands. By the end, we would have drank Canadian beer of all things. We started learning Spanish as fast as we could, but I think it all fell apart at the cash register of the marina store on Virginia Key. :(
 
I'm sure they will have more beer there this year. They just were not used to Key West and Ohio beer drinkers.
 
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