Friday Funnies....

Ratickle

Founding Member / Super Moderator
Our story begins at the Olympics, specifically the wrestling event. It is narrowed down to the Russian or the American for the gold medal.:USA:

Before the final match, the American wrestler’s trainer came to him and said, “Now don’t forget all the research we’ve done on this Russian. He’s never lost a match because of this “pretzel” hold he has. Whatever you do, don’t let him get you in this hold! If he does, you’re finished!”:boxing_smiley:

The wrestler nodded in agreement. Now, to the match: The American and the Russian circled each other several times looking for an opening. All of a sudden the Russian lunged forward, grabbing the American and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold!

A sigh of disappointment went up from the crowd, and the trainer buried his face in his hands for he knew all was lost. He couldn’t watch the ending.:(

Suddenly there was a horrible scream, and a resounding cheer from the crowd. The trainer raised his eye just in time to see the Russian flying up in the air. The Russian’s back hit the mat with a thud, and the American weakly collapsed on top of him, getting the pin and winning the match. :hurray::hurray:

The trainer was astounded! When he finally got the American wrestler alone, he asks, “How did you ever get out of that hold? No one has ever done it before!”

The wrestler answered, “Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold, but at the last moment, I opened my eyes and saw this pair of balls right in front of my face. I thought I had nothing to lose, so with my last ounce of strength I stretched out my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I could.



You’d be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own balls!”:sifone:



:rofl::rofl::rofl:
 
Billy and Joe were huge baseball fans.

One day, both Billy and Joe made a pact that if either of them were to die; they had to come back to the other in the form of a ghost to let the other know if baseball was played in heaven.

Sure enough, Billy dies and eventually comes to Joe one night in the form of a ghost.

A startled Joe realizes it is the ghost of his deceased friend and says “Billy, it is so good to see you…so tell me, is there baseball in Heaven?”.

“Well”, Billy says, “I have some good news and bad news for ya.:huh:

First the good news…YES, there is baseball in heaven!”.:hurray:

“Thank God!” Joe shouts…

“What is the bad news?!”.:huh:

“You’re pitching tomorrow.”:reddevil::reddevil::reddevil:
 
When I found the first one, I about spit my coffee everywhere.....


Did not see that coming......
 
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