.38Special
New member
Off to the Pub for a green beer and green eggs! Be safe everybody:seeya:
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Happy St. Patricks Day
- Thread starter .38Special
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Wrinkleface
Founding Member
back atcha Nick!! everybody have fun & B safe!!!!:cheers2:
MarylandMark
Charter Member
+1
Bobcat
Founding Member
Happy St. Paddy's everyone!!
Let's make sure we pay homage to the Leprechaun.
that magical leprechaun flute looked amazingly like a scaffold pin!:sifone:
Tommy Gun
Charter Member
An Irishman goes to confession in St. Patrick's Catholic Church. "Father, it has been one month since my last confession. I had relations with Nookie Green twice last month."
The priest tells the sinner, "You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary's."
Soon after, another Irishman enters the confessional. "Father, it has been two months since my last confession. I've had relations with Nookie Green twice a week for the last two months."
This time the priest questions, "Who is Nookie Green?"
"A new woman in the neighborhood," the sinner replies.
"Very well," sighs the priest. "Go and say ten Hail Mary's."
At Mass the next morning, as the priest prepares to deliver his sermon,
A tall, voluptuous, drop dead gorgeous redhead woman enters the sanctuary. The eyes of every man in the church fall upon her as she slowly sashays up the aisle and sits down right in front of the priest. Her dress is green and very short, with matching shiny emerald green shoes. The priest and altar boy gasp, as the woman in the matching green shoes and dress sits with her legs slightly spread apart.
The priest turns to the altar boy and whispers, "Is that Nookie Green?"
The bug-eyed altar boy can't believe his ears but replies, "No, I think it's just the reflection off her shoes................................"
The priest tells the sinner, "You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary's."
Soon after, another Irishman enters the confessional. "Father, it has been two months since my last confession. I've had relations with Nookie Green twice a week for the last two months."
This time the priest questions, "Who is Nookie Green?"
"A new woman in the neighborhood," the sinner replies.
"Very well," sighs the priest. "Go and say ten Hail Mary's."
At Mass the next morning, as the priest prepares to deliver his sermon,
A tall, voluptuous, drop dead gorgeous redhead woman enters the sanctuary. The eyes of every man in the church fall upon her as she slowly sashays up the aisle and sits down right in front of the priest. Her dress is green and very short, with matching shiny emerald green shoes. The priest and altar boy gasp, as the woman in the matching green shoes and dress sits with her legs slightly spread apart.
The priest turns to the altar boy and whispers, "Is that Nookie Green?"
The bug-eyed altar boy can't believe his ears but replies, "No, I think it's just the reflection off her shoes................................"
Tommy Gun
Charter Member
Paddy had been drinking at his local Dublin pub all day and most of the night celebrating St Patrick's Day.
Mick, the bartender says, " You'll not be drinking anymore tonight Paddy.
Paddy replies, "OK Mick, I'll be on my way then."
Paddy spins around on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his face.
"Shoite" he says and pulls himself up by the stool and dusts himself off.
He takes a step towards the door and falls flat on his face, "Shoite, Shoite!"
He looks to the doorway and thinks to himself that if he can just get to the door and some fresh air he'll be fine.
He belly crawls to the door and shimmies up the door frame.
He sticks his head outside and takes a deep breath of fresh air, feels much better and takes a step out onto the sidewalk and falls flat on his face.
"Bi'Jesus... I'm fockin' focked," he says.
He can see his house just a few doors down, and crawls to the door, hauls himself up the door frame, opens the door and shimmies inside.
He takes a look up the stairs and says "No fockin' way".
He crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and says "I can make it to the bed."
He pulls himself up takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face.
He says "Fock this " and crawls into bed.
The next morning, his wife, Jess, comes into the room carrying a cup of coffee and says, "Get up Paddy ... Did you have a bit to drink last night?".
Paddy says, "I did Jess. I barely made it home and boy was I fockin' pissed. But how'd you know?"
"Mick phoned, . . . You left your wheelchair at the pub."
Mick, the bartender says, " You'll not be drinking anymore tonight Paddy.
Paddy replies, "OK Mick, I'll be on my way then."
Paddy spins around on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his face.
"Shoite" he says and pulls himself up by the stool and dusts himself off.
He takes a step towards the door and falls flat on his face, "Shoite, Shoite!"
He looks to the doorway and thinks to himself that if he can just get to the door and some fresh air he'll be fine.
He belly crawls to the door and shimmies up the door frame.
He sticks his head outside and takes a deep breath of fresh air, feels much better and takes a step out onto the sidewalk and falls flat on his face.
"Bi'Jesus... I'm fockin' focked," he says.
He can see his house just a few doors down, and crawls to the door, hauls himself up the door frame, opens the door and shimmies inside.
He takes a look up the stairs and says "No fockin' way".
He crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and says "I can make it to the bed."
He pulls himself up takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face.
He says "Fock this " and crawls into bed.
The next morning, his wife, Jess, comes into the room carrying a cup of coffee and says, "Get up Paddy ... Did you have a bit to drink last night?".
Paddy says, "I did Jess. I barely made it home and boy was I fockin' pissed. But how'd you know?"
"Mick phoned, . . . You left your wheelchair at the pub."
getchasum111
Charter Member
yep...down to river street at 4 today....going to catch a buzzz and look at some boobies..hope to see some tits also
DollaBill
New member
Hey bro! Hope all is well. Have a great St. Pattys day. Hope to see you in Jax or Miami for the Bimini race
getchasum111
Charter Member
everything is good. haven't heard from you in a while. drop me a line when you have a minute
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