Saturday Snickers

[Ratickle]

President Obama is out jogging, and he encounters a man with some puppies. Obama asks the man what kind of puppies they are, and the man responds, "They're Democrat puppies, Mr. President." Obama thinks that is so great that the next day he brings the first lady to see these puppies for herself. He asks the man to tell Michelle what kind of puppies they are, and the man responds, "They're Republican puppies." The president looks puzzled and says, "Yesterday, you told me they were Democrat puppies." The man smiles and says, "Yesterday, they were. But today, they have their eyes open!"

 

[Ratickle]

Scariest Jack-O-Lantern ever.......

 

[Ratickle]

Joe and John were identical twins.

Joe owned an old dilapidated boat and kept pretty much to himself. One day he rented out his boat to a group of out-of-staters who sank it. Joe spent all day trying to salvage as much stuff as he could and was out of touch all that day and most of the evening.

Unbeknownst to him, his brother John's wife died suddenly.
When he got back on shore he went into town to pick up a few things at the grocery store. A kind old neighbor woman mistook him for John and said:
"I'm so sorry for your loss. You must feel terrible".

Joe, thinking she was talking about his boat said: "Hell no! Fact is I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always holding water. She had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy.

I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to those four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good and smelled bad. But they wanted her anyway. The darn fools tried to get in her all at one time and she split right up the middle!"

The old woman fainted.

 

[searaycer]

Hahahhaa

 

[old377guy]

Yep,....... we'll miss the old girl